Ronnie Ortiz-Magro returned to Jersey Shore as a new man on Thursday night.
A new man with new teeth, that is.
But a new man, with new teeth... who is stuck in an old (and dangerous) relationship.
On the latest installment of this beloved MTV franchise, Ronnie spoke with his friends about his then-recent 30-day stint in rehab.
(As previously detailed on The Hollywood Gossip, Ronnie admitted he hit rock bottom several months ago, citing alcoholism and depression as his reason for seeking professional help.)
He was in Los Angeles because he was thinking of moving away from Las Vegas... and Pauly D and Vinny were also there to film Double Shot at Love... and the trio caught up to chat about the changes Ronnie has made in his life.
"First impression of Ronnie is just like new Ronnie! New spirit, new clothes, just like a new -- NEW TEETH!" Vinny hilarious said during his confessional, adding:
"Holy shit! Teeth! Teeth. Teeth. Teeth! TEETH."
Why did Ronnie need new teeth?
Because Jen Harley allegedly damaged a few of his when she hurled a glass ashtray during a fight between the couple last New Year's Eve.
So, clearly, this brand new (and improved) Ronnie has seen the light and is anxious to leave Jen far behind, right?
WRONG.
"I'm great, man. I feel good, dude. Really, really good," Ronnie told Pauly on the episode, elaborating as follows:
"You know, I went to 30 days in treatment. I needed it, man. Too much shit was going on, you know? And I appreciate you guys always looking out for me, being there.
"I was just in it, and I couldn't see.
"Took time to reset, and I just had to do what I had to do for myself, the baby, because the decisions I [was] making were not the decisions a father should make."
That's a terrific attitude and great view on life.
Added Ronnie:
"I definitely feel like a different person since I went away to treatment. I feel really good, and I feel like I wanna be around the gang and show them that I'm back to being who I used to be."
But does he still want to be around Harley?
"As of right now, we're not together," Ronnie told Vinny when asked about his occasional girlfriend, adding:
"We haven't been together for a couple weeks. I gotta focus on myself. She's gotta wanna help herself. I can't keep trying to help her. Because trying to help her, I'm gonna drive myself crazy."
Of course, Ronnie uttered these words awhile back.
By all accounts, he and Harley are very much an item right now.
Moreover, just a few scenes after telling Vinny he was done with Jen, RONNIE WAS BACK TOGETHER WITH JEN ON AIR AS WELL.
The show depicted her and Ronnie hanging out in Vegas, with Ronnie explaining the reconciliation as follows:
"Um, you know, it’s crazy, but right now me and Jen are together. Making it work is the best for the baby, but I also feel like it’s just best for each other,” Ronnie said.
“We keep fighting for something, so there’s got to be something there. And it’s not the baby, because people raise kids without each other all the time.
"So it’s got to be something deeper."
Ronnie and Jen also talked about their daughter's first birthday party, which was just coming up when this episode was filmed.
When Ronnie said he'd be four months sober on that day, Harley asked if they'd be popping champagne, which didn't seem like a totally appropriate question.
"If you guys want," Ron replied.
SIGH.
This is not gonna end well -- if it ever really, truly ends at all.