If you caught last night's episode of Jersey Shore Family Vacation, you may have found yourself with a number of questions as the closing credits rolled:
Those questions may have included:
Wait, so that wasn't the season finale?
Why is this episode comprised of 65 percent old-footage flashbacks?
How is Mike so obsessed with Funfetti cake, when those little dots of color don't actually add any flavor. It's just yellow cake, Sitch?
(Fine, we'll give the guy a break since he's headed to prison soon.)
But the biggest question of the night, of course, was what in the actual f-ck is going on with Vinny and Angelina?
After nearly a decade of being acquainted with this cast, we have a pretty good idea of the group dynamic, but because Angelina packed her trash bags and went home on two separate occasions, we don't really know how she relates to her fellow guidos.
Yes, we know that with the possible exception of Snooki, nobody really likes Angelina, but until recently, we were in the dark about why certain cast members -- chief among them, Vinny -- seem to harbor such intense resentment toward the Hamster.
Over the course of the past two weeks, however, those questions have mostly been answered.
While Vinny and Angelina might not have grown up on the same block, as she claims, they both hail from Staten Island and knew each other for several years before becoming re-acquainted in Seaside.
Kinda weird that that never came up during the show's original run, but whatever.
Anyway, as pretty much everyone else in the house pointed out last night, the antipathy between Angelina and Vinny could easily have doubled as sexual tension.
And since Vinny and Angelina have hooked up before, it's not surprising everyone speculated that they will again.
And here's the thing about that -- they're 100 percent right.
These two will absolutely end up in the smush room on a future episode of Shore.
Now, you may be thinking, but hold on isn't Angelina engaged?
And to that we say yes -- but she's been engaged three times before and she conveniently ditched her ring just prior to her latest stint on Shore.
Add to that the fact that Pivarnick gave her fiance a tattoo of a hamster with sh-t and period blood dripping out of it on Snooki's new show last night, and it becomes quite clear that those two are never making it down the aisle.
Of course, there are still some significant barriers standing between Pivarnick and Guadagnino.
Namely, the fact that the entire cast's distaste for Angelina is palpable in every scene.
But that probably won't be enough to stop Vin from making a regrettable decision after a little too much Ron-Ron juice.
We wonder how his newly bro-mitted hetero life-mate Pauly D feels about all this ...
